I recently broke down and read this "eight beers you are supposed to avoid like the plague or dating a Kardashian" article that's been floating around the Internet the past couple of weeks in various incarnations. The reasons you should avoid these beers, the article points out, are potentially hazardous ingredients to your health. When I read the list, however, there was much room for deliberation. The culprits, as follows...
1) Newcastle Brown Ale
3) Corona Extra
4) Miller Lite
5) Michelob Ultra
7) Coors Light
8) Pabst Blue Ribbon
Okay, I lied...there was very little room for deliberation. The only two on this list I drink on anything near a regular basis are Corona Extra and Guinness, and it's a month of blue-mooned Sundays when I even drink a Guinness. The news that Corona Extra has GMO Corn Syrup and Propylene Glycol makes me rethink my occasional Corona, but then again, I guess that just makes it the Mountain Dew of beers.
Sad, I suppose, is the news I'm giving up Guinness. Not like it tasted like anything than liquid inky black death, but dude...fish bladder? Why the fuck would you use that to make a beer? Why, damn it, why? Leave the fish organs in the dumpster behind the sushi restaurant where they belong and just make beer damn it!
The main reason I can think of to avoid the beers on the list is simple. They all suck. Hard. They all stink on ice. Most of them are that fizzy yellow water that must look great on HDTV, but taste like fizzy yellow water when you crack one open. I am by no sense a beer snob, but is it so wrong for beer to taste like beer, instead of whatever it is most of the companies above are trying to peddle?
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