Tito Ortiz: Dumbass in Motion

It's always kind of a neat experience when you can tell someone might have been hit in the head once or twice too many times. 

This time around, the example would have to be former UFC Light-Heavyweight Champion and Hall of Famer Tito Ortiz. No, not for successfully throwing the hotdog down Jenna Jameson's hallway and getting twins in return, but for comparing his time in UFC with slavery.

Yes, the very same UFC that is the only way you would have ever heard of the Low Forehead from Huntington Beach. The very same UFC he made millions in fight payouts from. The very same UFC that let him fight out his contract, even though it's obvious whatever championship form he may have had is long, LONG the fuck gone. He's only won two of his last ten fights going back to 2006, and one of those wins was to Ken Shamrock three minutes past forever ago. 

Despite a 1-7-1 tear since that fight with Shamrock, they decided putting this loudmouth into the Hall of Fame was a good idea. He has since taken his show to Bellator, a promotion that is sadly desperate enough to try and package Ortiz in a fight with another guy known more recently for bark than bite- "Rampage" Jackson. How desperate is Bellator? They've quasi-partnered with steadily sinking ship TNA Wrestling to keep these bums semi-relevant until their fight. You know, kind of like how you know an action flick is going to be a dog if Subway gets the tie-in (The Lone Ranger just being the latest example).

But to compare the majority of your career and subsequent fame to slavery? The only thing Tito Ortiz is a slave to is his own hype, and trust me, the lyrics to that spiritual are getting old quick, at least if you can find anyone who still bothers to sing along...

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