In blow to GOP establishment, Tea Party forces run-off (via AFP) The US Republican establishment suffered an embarrassing political setback Tuesday courtesy of a Tea Party challenger, who battled a long-time Senate incumbent to a draw in a Mississippi race with national implications. Seven other states also held… Four decades of Democrats: A look at how Republicans have lost U.S. Senate races in NJ (via NJ.com) TRENTON — Four Republicans are in a primary battle today for the right to face Democratic U.S. Sen. Cory Booker. Whomever wins the GOP nod will have an uphill battle as none of the candidates has big name recognition or much cash against the popular… Taliban threaten Afghan election, warn voters to stay away (via AFP) Taliban insurgents threatened Monday to attack Afghanistan's run-off presidential election, warning voters to stay away from polling stations for fear of injury or death. Afghans are due to go to the polls on June 14 to choose whether Ashraf Ghani or… Wow, some Saturday nights are full of fun and the possibility of drunken nudity, others are wells filled with dead people and 75 cents. After a man climbed to the bottom of a well to retrieve his money, he succumbed to a lack of oxygen and passed out. Once others in the village realized what had happened, six people climbed down to try and rescue the man, only to succumb to the lack of oxygen themselves. Naturally, the headline on this read 7 die after trying to retrieve 75 cents in well in Cambodia, which is not at all how the story reads. Maybe seven people died over 75 cents, but only the idiot that started the whole mess was going after his change, but I guess New York Daily News figured making up an alternate version of the headline might draw more reader comment... Meanwhile...when you see the headline "Woman gets nickname of 'China's human kebob' after successfully falling off a building and landing on a 20-foot piece of rebar," you kind of think why bother? I mean, the headline kind of sums up the entire story. Then again, you're kind of hoping for pics, right? Sad to say, but I'm pretty damn sure there are only two ways to earn the nickname 'China's human kebob,' and neither one of them are really something you want photos of online. Opening the article in a new tab, I kind of had the feeling this was gonna be a Daily Mail article. Sure enough, it was. Pictures? Oh yes, and x-rays, too. I wouldn't check them out on your lunch break, unless you're just that kind of individual. but that's just me. Bet you she's probably wishing she'd earned the dubious honor of 'China's human kebob' the other way. Lot less recovery time, I would imagine. Maybe a donut pillow and a couple of ice packs... Now, with The Chinese Human Kebob on the shelf, there is continued disarray in superhero land. As reported last weekend on the Seattle Post-Intelligencer blog, local superhero-type guy Phoenix Jones (real name Ben Fodor, cause in the real world, secret identities cause way more hassles than the comic books lead on) has announced he is putting an end to an attempt to expand his Rain City Superhero Movement, after things did not go as well as planned.
The band of superheroes, which has not only gained begrudging tolerance from the Seattle Police, but the creation of faux supervillain Rex Velvet, to boot, ran into trouble when Jones Last year, Jones announced he was looking for people with a bulletproof vest, CPR skills and military police or martial arts experience they weren't using in any real constructive sense. However, Jones announced on his Facebook page (because superheroes in the real world have social media, not fortresses of solitude) that several members could not meet minimum fitness requirements or medical training, and others still lacked any kind of professionalism, he said. The announcement naturally sent Rex Velvet into a state of triumphant swoon, as he gloated and put out the word he was now interested in dirt on the Rain City Superheroes. This shit really happened, people. Half the shit on TV sucks, but this shit is going down in real time! Don't worry, though...neither the booming superhero scene in Seattle nor it's newly passed $15 minimum wage on the horizon is enough to make me want to live in Seahawk country. So, a 113-year-old woman got married to her 70-year-old suitor this week in a simple ceremony at their Chinese nursing home? That's just a lovely story right there. Something tells me this is the kind of crap Nicholas Sparks will be writing when he's in his 90s, cause something tells me we're all gonna be just that lucky. The marriage of Azatihan Sawuti to her groom, Aimti Ahemti, came about after a whirlwind 6-month courtship at their Bachu County, Xinjiang retirement facility. Of course, there had to be a joke or two in the comments about cougars and robbing the cradle. Typical "I commented first!" overachieving right there. I'm surprised nobody brought up some kind of booming market for that in Japan, the honeymoon video from this kind of nonsense. I'd probably be more surprised if that kind of shit didn't exist in Japan at this very moment. My doubts aside about the veracity of this story, a piece of fluffery for the weekend, I noticed at the end of the article those "around the web" links I need to get around to installing here one of these days. Something about breastfeeding, another collection of snarky eCards, could Jamie Lee Curtis be a hermaphrodite, Gisele Bundchen posing nude for...did that shit just ask if Jamie Lee Curtis could be a hermaphrodite? Let me go out on a branch here and say no. Aw, hell no. Absolutely. The. Hell. No. I wonder how much of my demographics with confused boners right now, trying to process extreme old-ass cougar porn and Jamie Lee Curtis doing the dance scene in True Lies, but now they don't know what to fucking think. Then again, you should be asking why the hell you are getting a confused boner reading my blog. Some Hollywood rumors, like who knows what about the night Natalie Wood drowned, I can understand, others, like this kind of shit, I can't figure out. The link to the Jamie Lee Curtis story takes to you About.com, so take the rest of the story for what it's worth, especially since it's a nine-page slideshow you gotta click through to find out the same thing the smarter people already knew: there is absolutely no truth whatsoever to any rumor that Curtis is a hermaphrodite or suffers from AIS (Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, hit the Bing and look it up) has never been proven and is almost certainly false. I mean, has far as rehashing old news, repackaging it, and really adding nothing new while you were at it, the slideshow disguised as an article succeeds at being clickbait. Clickbait that will undoubtedly draw clicks from the curious and kinda of dense. And before any of them starting searching WebMD, no the Activia did not cause any of whatever is supposedly going on with Jamie Lee Curtis. Dogs Compete For Surfing Championship (via ABC News) Southern California competition allows pets to take the spotlight, master the waves. Shinseki, Carney Resign from White House, and More (via Wall Street Journal Digital Network) What's News: White House Press Secretary Jay Carney and Veterans Affairs Chief Eric Shinseki resign from their posts. Google creates 'right to be forgotten' website. Zuckerberg donates $120 million to San Francisco schools. Joanne Po reports. VA secretary is on 'thin ice' (via CNN Video) Veteran Affairs Secretary Eric Shinseki is on "probation" as its discovered more military veterans were denied care. This is Molly Schuyler. She is a competitive eater from Nebraska, and a lady who likes a challenge. In that spirit, she decided to take on The Big Texan Steak Ranch, and she won in what could only be called the competitive eating equivalent of a first-round knockout. Schuyler managed to take down two 72-ounce steak dinners in under 15 minutes (14 minutes, 57 seconds if you wanna nitpick), and that was after breakfast to boot. Damn, girl...you took in 9 pounds of meat orally in under fifteen minutes? I'm waiting for the follow-up where Kris Jenner names you an honorary Kardashian sister... Schuyler had an hour in which to accomplish the chowdown. Steak dinner #1 (side dishes- salad, roll, shrimp, and a baked potato) went down in less than five minutes, leaving her plenty of time to knock off the second helping with room to spare, so to speak. Previously, this champion of over-consumption took down 363 chicken wings in 30 minutes to take 1st place (and a $22,000 payday) in Philly, so now...where to go next? What is the next challenge for this woman who freely describes herself as a "bottomless pit?" I don't rightly know, but she is interested in making a future return to The Big Texan- to eat THREE steak dinners in one sitting. On that note, even I'm pushing back from the table because I'm full... (Updated to correct my earlier failure in math, changing "12 pounds" to "9 pounds" because I inexplicably thought a pound was 12 ounces instead of 16. ) Accepting Amazon's DRM Makes It Impossible To Challenge Its Monopoly (via Techdirt) Amazon was the target of some well-deserved criticism this past week for making the anti-customer move of suspending sales of books published by Hachette, reportedly as a hardball tactic in its ongoing negotiations over ebook revenue splits. In an excellent… |
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Winner, The Blogitzer
(Best Overall Writing), 2011 Blogger's Choice Awards Archives
July 2014
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